Tag: Family

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#blogjune Life Random thoughts

Time flies…

… when you’re having fun. Or so they say. But my days are FLYING past (I can’t believe it’s been a week since #blogjune finished) and I’m not entirely sure that it’s because I’m having fun. So does that mean, then, that if I *were* having fun, that the days would be going past even faster than they seem to be right now? I wonder…

I’ve been doing some intensive decluttering of my house over the past couple of weeks. A truckload (yes, a truck was involved!) of un-used stuff has been donated, and the rubbish bins have been full-to-overflowing the last few pick-ups. And there’s still more to go 🙁

Moving three children, with their stuff, out of three bedrooms, has certainly been an exercise in patience! But it’s been a needed activity, and I’m glad I’m sorting through items that had been ‘stored’ (read: undealt with) for several years – with some items, over a decade! And my runny nose is back, courtesy of all the dust… but I’m excited that in the not-too-distant future, the cherubs will be back in their own rooms again, with a LOT less stuff, and the twenty-year-old carpet will be replaced with easy-t0-keep=clean-and-dust-free, tiles 🙂

Yes!!!

Have a great day, dear reader 🙂

-KRidwyn

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#blogjune Life Review

Over for another year..

Hello again, dear reader.

This marks the final post for my 2015 #blogjune journey. It’s been different to what I had expected. I had *hoped* that I’d be able to post every day. But, just as in the last five years, that never happened. I still managed 30 posts – but because several days had two or more posts in them. And this post marks the 112th post in the #blogjune category – and that sounds pretty impressive to me 🙂

So, to recap for 2015:

1. On the relationship between libraries, teaching and vocal nodules I lamented my not-going-to-Library-volunteering-due-to-laryngitis day

2. Keeping it at bay – the laryngitis, that is – related my happiness at getting so much editing done the day before, and also re-discovering the five (count them! 5!) folders of research that I’d done for a historical novel ten years ago, before Miss10 came along

3. Looking backwards, looking forwards referred to my experiences with #blogjune (cherubs traditionally picking up vomiting bugs during the first week of June) and my excitement about the #WritingRace I attend every Wednesday evening.

4. So I succumbed – Laryngitis got me, finally. It was the choir rehearsals that did it, I tell you!

5. Ask me why I’m happy – Hubby finished his CPA studies!

6. So it happened again – I was *so* hoping to get away with a vomit-free first week of #blogjune. But Miss7 changed that. Sigh.

7. Smiling – while sick : my 41st birthday!

8. Grateful was a post thanking my peeps for all the birthday love – and I finished reading Stephen King’s On Writing 🙂

9 – 14. The next few posts were a series on how I parent. I regularly get comments on the good behaviour of my kids, so I thought I’d blog about why. Things like Rewards First, Stuff Costs Money (understanding the value of things), Set Expectations, Consistency is Key, Make Milestones Memorable and finished it with a post on Mummy: my kids’ perspective

15. This Saturday looked ahead to the Krav Maga grading I was to sit that weekend

16. whoops – where I realised that I’d missed a day of blogging. My first for the month. So I’d made it through to day 15 before misisng a day! Happy with that 🙂

17. Predicting the game – the State of Origin rugby league match, that’s pretty big on the east coast of Australia during June. And I got it right 🙂

18. Training – Miss10 had been giving me back massages all week, possibly in response to the hard training I was doing preparing for my grading. Which was absolutely beautiful!

19. On dreams – I wonder what “being suffocated by render” means?

20. I passed!!! (Still shaking my head in disbelief, actually…)

21. Sabriel – my thoughts on the Garth Nix novel of the same name, which I’d read that afternoon. Being unable to do much else but lie prone, of course!

22. Conversations with my younger children – in which both Miss7 and Mr6 surprised me.

23. Hat-less: a selfie. These are rare. But I felt that my first day without-a-hat since shaving my head for #WorldsGreatestShave back in March was reason enough to grin and bear that rear-facing camera…

24. four days behind  because I was! And my reason why…

25. On socks and sewing – in which I recounted hopeful improvements in my ‘school socks’ system, and also my woeful sewing skills

26. sore – Some furniture was moved in preparation for the laying of tiles which had been delivered – which we had just discovered were the wrong tiles! (Am still seething over this one…)

27. Feedback from beta-readers – my take on the feedback I’ve received on my book to date

28. Tiles – part 2 : situation resolved (we can but hope) where the correct tiles will apparently be delivered next week…

29. Reading time – where I got to the bottom of why Mr6 refuses to read certain words

30. Over for another year – this one that’s you’re reading right now, the recap post where I’ve reminisced on the events of the past month.

Thanks for reading, and here’s wishing you a lovely day, as always!

— KRidwyn

Categories
#blogjune family anecdotes Reading Review

Reading time

I’m sitting at the dining table. Mr6 is next to me, reading to me. I love that!

He’s chosen his favourite books.

Bears on Wheels by Stan and Jan Berenstain

Go, Dog. Go! by P.D. Eastman

and

Inside, Outside, Upside down by Stan and Jan Berenstain

He’s just finished the last page. We had a discussion about the text on the final page. Mr6 refuses to read the first line: “Mama! Mama!” His coping strategy (typical autism here) – he runs away if he’s made to read it. He always has. Today we talked about why. I thought that it was because the word is different to what we use at home: he calls me ‘Mummy’ not ‘Mama’. But no, that’s not it. He said that it was because if he said it, the mother bear should be answering, “Yes, yes?”

Interesting, hey! Well, I think so, at least 🙂

Have a great day, dear reader!

— KRidwyn

Categories
#blogjune Random thoughts teaching Work

four days behind…

And I was so proud of how I’d been going with #blogjune this year, too! I guess I hadn’t really realised just how incredibly busy I would be this week. And how little time I’d get to blog. And I’m sad about that.

On paper, this past week seemed a fairly normal week. Sure, I’d have our school’s semester one performance night on Thursday night, but then I’d have Friday off, so I’d be able to recuperate while the kids were at school, and get myself ready for the two weeks of school holidays 🙂

But the reality didn’t match my expectations. Two days of sports carnivals and not-as-helpful-as-I-would-have-liked colleagues meant that although I had *planned* that the performance program order was finalised by Tuesday 9am, so that programs could be written, printed, photocopied, and the powerpoint made… in reality, the program order was only finalised at 12.45pm on Thursday. Dealing with this caused numerous headaches – and the sleepless nights caused by a sick child, and stress over other work issues didn’t make things easier.

Cue swearing and throwing of inanimate objects at other inanimate objects,  (discreetly, of course, where there was noone within earshot, no witnesses, and no harm came to any of the inanimate objects involved,) and a crazy-busy period between 12.45pm and 4pm on Thursday where I managed to get an insanely huge amount of work done WHILE running a choir rehearsal then two Year 3 lessons where the classes were learning and playing recorder (and, of course, fielding several phone calls during this time too) and also collecting two children from their various excursions that had happened that day, and getting Mr6 off to a doctor appointment with Hubby while Miss10 also decided to do a disappearing act on both Hubby and I… just thinking about it, two days later, makes me shake my head and wonder how on earth it all managed to happen! Still, it did, and by 5.45pm, Miss10 and Miss7 and I were fed, ready, and they had also helped me to set up the venue (including supper area, of course, and it was at this point that I realised that I had NO tea, coffee, milk or sugar organised. Whoops.) Cue more swearing (inside my head because students and parents were arriving for the 6pm performance) and some immensely helpful parents, and then it was 6.02 and I was on stage, welcoming everyone to our major evening for Semester One.

Home and collapse by 11pm. But you know those nights when you have so much adrenalin you can’t sleep? That.

And then Hubby couldn’t do the school run on Friday, so the kids stayed underfoot all day. But 95 square metres of tiles *did* get delivered at 5.15pm that day, ready for laying starting 7am this coming Monday, so from then til this minute, I’ve been attempting to empty 95 square metres of furniture out of my house so that the tiles can be laid. And that particular task hasn’t been anywhere near as successful as I’d like it to have been.

So. Four days late for my 24 of June #blogjune entry. Whoops. But I think my excuse is valid, yes?

Have a great day, dear reader!

— KRidwyn

 

Categories
#blogjune momentous events

Conversations with my younger children…

Yesterday, we went out for breakfast. Mooloolaba Surf Club – breakfast overlooking the water. All you can eat. And the food is always yummier if you’re the one not preparing it or washing up, don’t you find?

Miss7 decided to serve herself fruit salad. She ate some rockmelon, gushing, “This is my favourite fruit of all time! I love rockmelon just sooooooooo much!”

I looked at her. (We rarely have rockmelon in the house, because I’m the only one who eats it.) “Really?” I asked “Since when?”

She paused in her munching, and thought about it for a few moments. Then she turned to me, all seriousness, and said “Since I was six.”

It was hard to keep a straight face, but I managed. I think.

Mr6’s conversation, immediately after breakfast, left a different kind of feeling. He took my hand, looked into my eyes, and said, “Mummy?”

“Yes, my sweet?”

“I’m autistic.”

“Yes,” I said, my eyes tearing up. “Yes, my sweet. You are.”

It was a bittersweet meal.

 

Categories
#blogjune Blogging challenges

‘Mummy’ – my kids’ perspective

To finish up this week on raising kids, I thought I might get my kids to complete that Facebook survey that’s been doing the rounds over the last week or so. Here are my kids’ answers, word for word:

Child No1, aged 10

  1. What is something Mummy always says to you? I love you.
  2. What makes Mummy happy? ‘Mummy and me’ time.
  3. What makes Mummy sad? When she has to yell at me.
  4. How does Mummy make you laugh? By doing funny things and tickling me.
  5. What was Mummy like as a child? I don’t know.
  6. How old is Mummy? 41.
  7. How tall is Mummy? 1 metre
  8. What is Mummy’s favourite thing to do? Tickle kids and have hugs.
  9. What does Mummy do when you’re not here? Play with toys.
  10. If Mummy becomes famous, what will it be for? I don’t know.
  11. What is Mummy really good at? Singing.
  12. What is Mummy not very good at? High jump.
  13. What is Mummy’s job? Music teacher.
  14. What makes you proud of Mummy? How much money she earns.
  15. What is Mummy’s favourite food? Apple crumble.
  16. What do you and Mummy do together? Play.
  17. How are you and Mummy the same? Music talent.
  18. If your Mummy was a cartoon character, who would she be? The Mayor on My Little Pony
  19. How are you and Mummy different? She has short hair.
  20. How do you know Mummy loves you? Because she gives me a bed to sleep in and a room and a house and a family and a big property and pets and vitamins that I hate, when I’m sick.
  21. What does Mummy like best about Daddy? That he’s her husband.
  22. Where is Mummy’s favourite place to go? Out.
  23. How old was Mummy when she had you? I don’t want to do Maths.

Child No2, aged 7

  1. What is something Mummy always says to you? I love you.
  2. What makes Mummy happy? Me.
  3. What makes Mummy sad? When I do the wrong thing.
  4. How does Mummy make you laugh? By tickling me.
  5. What was Mummy like as a child? She read books all the time.
  6. How old is Mummy? 41.
  7. How tall is Mummy? Not so tall.
  8. What is Mummy’s favourite thing to do? Play with her kids.
  9. What does Mummy do when you’re not here? Work.
  10. If Mummy becomes famous, what will it be for? Being smart.
  11. What is Mummy really good at? Tickling.
  12. What is Mummy not very good at? Watching TV.
  13. What is Mummy’s job? Teaching.
  14. What makes you proud of Mummy? {What does that mean?} That she’ a good Mum.
  15. What is Mummy’s favourite food? ice-cream
  16. What do you and Mummy do together? Tickle eachother.
  17. How are you and Mummy the same? We’re both middle children.
  18. If your Mummy was a cartoon character, who would she be? One of the old ladies in ‘Puss in Boots’.
  19. How are you and Mummy different? Age.
  20. How do you know Mummy loves you? Because if I didn’t have Mummy, things wouldn’t go very well.
  21. What does Mummy like best about Daddy? Something.
  22. Where is Mummy’s favourite place to go? Library.
  23. How old was Mummy when she had you? I don’t know.

Child No3, aged 6

  1. What is something Mummy always says to you? You can play on the playstation after you eat your food.
  2. What makes Mummy happy? Doing the right thing.
  3. What makes Mummy sad? When I cry.
  4. How does Mummy make you laugh? When I say something different.
  5. What was Mummy like as a child? She used to work.
  6. How old is Mummy? I forgot.
  7. How tall is Mummy? About this high – my arm almost reaches!
  8. What is Mummy’s favourite thing to do? Listen to me.
  9. What does Mummy do when you’re not here? She goes to school.
  10. If Mummy becomes famous, what will it be for? I don’t understand.
  11. What is Mummy really good at? Making the fire [in the fireplace] and dinner.
  12. What is Mummy not very good at? Playing on the Wii. She keeps on coming last.
  13. What is Mummy’s job? Teaching.
  14. What makes you proud of Mummy? Nothing.
  15. What is Mummy’s favourite food? Ice-blocks or ice-cream
  16. What do you and Mummy do together? I help Mummy to make the fire.
  17. How are you and Mummy the same? When I grow up.
  18. If your Mummy was a cartoon character, who would she be? I don’t know.
  19. How are you and Mummy different? Mummy has a lot of spots and I’m a lot smaller.
  20. How do you know Mummy loves you? When she says ‘I love you’.
  21. What does Mummy like best about Daddy? I don’t know.
  22. Where is Mummy’s favourite place to go? To the park.
  23. How old was Mummy when she had you? Umm…maybe… 39 years old?

So there you have it! I guess I tell my kids that I love them enough – but maybe they don’t hear me say it to Hubby? And if I want my kids to spontaneously buy me a packet of Raffaello from time to time, I guess I’m going to need to tell then that it’s my all-time favourite food, aren’t I?!

Have a great day, dear reader!

— KRidwyn

Categories
family anecdotes Random thoughts

Raising kids #2

So I posted yesterday my Number One parenting tip: rewards first. The second however, follows closely behind…

Tip #2: stuff costs money.

We know this. We all know it. You get what you pay for in life. Want a new car? Or a house? A holiday? A meal at a nice restaurant? You can have them all – but you need to pay for them. If you’re in the market for a car, and you like Toyota Landcruisers but only have $10K to spend, it’s far more likely that the car you end up buying looks more like Mr Bean’s than you’d like it too.

Likewise, my kids understand the value of things. They understand… because they can be quick learners when they have the incentive to be!

I mentioned yesterday that my kids earn points (and therefore money) by ticking off chores on the app Choremonster. This gives them money to spend.

It also gives them money to lose, on taxes.

Yes, you read that right. Taxes.

Stuff costs money. Including stuff that kids should be responsible for, themselves.

My kids know that they need to pick up after themselves; put things away where they should go.

They also are aware that, when people move house, for example, they pay someone to help them move.

This is what I have in my house.

Mr 6 can’t be bothered moving his bike from where he left it, back to where it should live? That’s fine. I’ll move it for him, and he’ll pay me for the privilege. Moving tax. Miss7 continually leaves her Wii remote on the lounge? Fine, but if it’s still there when I need to sit down, I’ll need to move it and she’ll pay a moving tax. Miss 10, towel on the floor? Fine again – but it incurs a moving tax if she expects me to do it for her.

It’s brilliant; I love it. The kids know that they need to be responsibile, otherwise they’ll end up paying for the privilege of being lazy. And it’s not a set sum. Wii remotes are generally only 20 cents, but moving a bike can be up to $5 (we have a large property). And it adds up! When Miss7 takes off her school uniform and leaves it all on the floor, then that can be 20c for the left shoe, 20c for the right shoe, 20c per sock, 20c for the shirt, 20c for the shorts – that’s $1.20 just for the uniform! Watch out if she’s left her homework folder, school bag, lunchbox etc on the floor as well!

They only do it once.

And taxes don’t just apply to moving things. I have a ‘lights tax’ (for when they leave their bedroom light on) and also a ‘laundering clean clothes tax’ (this one is mainly for Miss10, I must admit). I’ve told her that if she lets her clean school shirt falls off the hanger and onto the floor of her wardrobe, and she then assumes that because it’s on the floor then it’s dirty, and she puts in the laundry ready to be washed again, then that’s fine. I’m happy to wash her perfectly clean shirt, and she needs to be happy to pay me $3 for the privilege. She’s been more careful since she tried that one!

It also applies to food. If my kids want to leave their sandwich crusts, they can. But they can also help me pay for the loaf of bread that they’re choosing to waste. 5 cents per crust is our going rate. And that way, it’s their choice. They can eat their food, or they can pay to leave it. It’s fair, and it cuts out arguments.

Right now, you’re probably thinking, ‘that’s tough’. Yes, possibly so. But my kids are learning that Mummy won’t always be there for them. They’re learning that stuff costs, and things have value.

So many kids today don’t understand that, I’ve noticed. My kids do.

And the way I see it, they’re going to have to learn it one day! May as well be now.

So anyway, that’s my tip #2.

And here’s hoping that you have a lovely rest-of-the-day, dear reader!

Yours,

KRidwyn

Categories
family anecdotes Life

Raising kids #1

I posted yesterday that my kids aren’t noisy ones. And I’ve been mulling over for a while now, a few posts with regard to this.

Quite regularly, I’m given compliments regarding the good behaviour of my children. And I love hearing these comments! So I thought I’d share what works for me. Disclaimer: this is only what’s been working for ME. I hope that it may work for you, too, but each and everyone’s situation is different, hey!

So, here goes. #1. Rewards first.

One of my favourite Bible verses is Proverbs 29:18, which talks about ‘where there is no vision, [the] people perish’. Meaning: you’ve got to have an end-goal in mind. Something to work for. A reward that you can see, that you want, that makes the doing of stuff-that-you-don’t-want-to-do, worthwhile. Call it a bribe, if you will, but honestly, who doesn’t work without one? Adults get paychecks, so why shouldn’t children?

With that in mind, I love the app ChoreMonster. It’s free, and it helps my children be responsible for their own ‘rewards’. Each child has their own profile, and there are dozens of different chores that you can load onto their profiles. I’d suggest just a few for starters, because you don’t want to overwhelm them! As each chore is done, the child send it to you for approval, and they get to spin a carnival-style prize wheel, which gives them either good prizes – monsters to collect (and there’s good reading practice for younger kids, showing what each monster likes) or kid-style bad prizes (warning: some toilet humour involved here!)

Once the parent has approved the chore, they also receive points towards a reward of their own choosing – again, there are dozens to choose from. So there’s Maths skills involved there as well, where my kids add up exactly how many points they need to get to their wanted reward. And the best thing about these rewards – they’re completely earned, so there’s no subjectivity and ‘it’s not fair’ cries from little mouths. Parents can also give ‘boost points’ if they want, for good behaviour, doing well in a spelling test at school, helping with the gardening, etc etc.

But what I like the most? It’s fully customisable. I don’t actually use the default chores, or the default rewards. I use their program, and have tailored it completely to our own household and my own expectations. So ‘chores’ for my kids include ‘pack schoolbag’ and ‘brush teeth’ and ‘unpack the dishwasher’ but I also have ‘child-specific homework’ (eg. readers for Mr6 but Maths Mentals for Miss10) and ‘violin practice’ (three different reward options for three different lengths of practice) on there too, for example.

With the rewards side of things, I use a point = one cent system. So if a child wants to exchange ChoreMonster points for cash to spend at the shops, they know that 200 points equals a $2 coin. Or if they want me to treat them to McDonald’s, then they need 500 ChoreMonster points (for each child for wants to go). But generally, they use it for in-app purchases for their favourite games. So they can buy gems for DragonVale, for example. On Sunday just gone, both Miss10 and Mr6 bought diamonds for the app SingingMonsters because the app was having a currency sale. They were pretty stoked – Miss 10 bought 100 diamonds, Mr 6 bought 50. Miss7 was a little put out, but then again she *had* bought gems for the MyLittlePony app just a few weeks earlier!

So – that’s my Tip #1. Rewards first. Give them a vision, something to work towards, and make sure it’s something that THEY want.

And all the best with it!

Have a lovely day, dear reader 🙂

— KRidwyn

Categories
Uncategorized

Weather event

helpless – a poem

I sit
In silence.

There should be noise.
There should be people.

“Weather event,” they say.
“Too dangerous,” they say.

 

I hug my knees tight against my chest. I dare not swallow, straining instead to hear the sounds I seek. My throat is tight. Every part of my body is tense. I am a taut coil of stillness.

And silence.

Ready to explode.

But waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting.

 

News reports gleefully show photos. Videos.

Wind. And rain.

And water, water, water, water, water.

Reporters with fake concern spout statistics.

More questions than answers fill my computer screen, my news feeds; friends and followers all seeking information when there’s none to give. More questions. Few answers. I turn off the TV.  The batteries die in my devices, one by one.
Worry consumes me.

Parents, like me,
sit
and wait
Watching
Listening to the silence
Worrying

Worrying

Worrying
And worrying
And worrying.

There should be noise here. There should be people.

But I sit
In silence

And worry.

How long, Lord? How long?

 

Aftermath – a poem

The surf roars this morning.

It’s showing off. Reminding the world of the power of nature.

The power to disrupt lives.

To take lives.

The kids arrived home from school gone 10 o’clock last night. Every road had been cut. But they were safe.

Not every child could say that.

 

Parents

sitting vigils over empty houses

had cried with relief

Loved ones home, safe.

But not every parent made it home safe last night.

 

Morning sun brings answers

There is dryness. Warmth. Work to do, repairs to make.

But not everyone will see the sun today. Not everyone will help with the work.

 

And the distant surf is roaring this morning. Boasting of the power of nature

to disrupt lives.

To take lives.

I can hear it.

Amidst the noise, the surf.

Roaring.

Categories
momentous events

It’s new kitchen day!

Regular readers of my blog may remember that I wrote a little while back about getting extensions done to my house. Well, that’s still on the cards – but while we’re waiting for plans / architects / builders / quotes / soil test results / council etc etc etc, I’ve made a start (never one to wait – that’s me! Impatience with a capital IM) and decided to make changes to my kitchen.

A good friend, who I thought was a cabinetmaker, actually turned out to be a kitchen installer in the US several years ago, so he’s been building me a new one. And he completely ‘gets’ my ‘limited budget’ attitude, while still finding quality materials and products. Which is AWESOME! Sa far, I’ve had a couple of metres of bench space removed (which sounds crazy, I know, but it was just a dumping ground for ‘stuff’ – and it’s removal has opened up the whole house) and 8 upper cabinets installed, which look fantastic at the moment, and will look incredible when  the doors are added too!

But today is ‘gut the lower cabinets, pop off the old tile splashback, and start installing the lower cabinets day’. Which will be HUGE. I’m really looking forward to seeing what they look like – and to having a kitchen with a working stove/oven again!!! (it’s been weird looking at an empty space where my stand-alone gas stove/oven used to be for the past week! Plus, it’s been even more difficult to get inspired about making the dinner for some strange reason!)

So. Huge day. Here’s hoping that you have a great day too, dear reader!