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Random thoughts Scribblings Work Writing

7/52 On Writing

My blog descriptor says ‘Educator, Librarian, Writer’. It’s difficult to write – the hardest thing in the world, some writers would say… and yet the easiest task to do as well, just sitting and writing. But it’s the writing of GOOD words which is difficult. The editing that goes on in the head as you write, the ‘boy oh boy this sentence is awful’ echo chamber that persists in whispering no matter how many times you mentally silence it, ask it to politely shut up, yell at it, ad infinitum.

And it’s crucial to do so. It’s not possible to edit as you draft, not effectively, anyway. You have to get the ideas out first, all of them down on paper or onto the screen, before you can decide which is good and which not so good, which needs refnining and which need discarding.

And then editing! That spectrum between the raptures of joy and the awfulness of drudgery, from the excitement of crafting your words into something amazing to the growing horror of realisation that there’s no way this thought should ever see the light of day. ‘What will people think of me?” “What does this say about the person that I am?” “They’ll see how pathetic this is and won’t like me anymore!” “Will they like this as much as I do?” “What if it’s awful and I just don’t know it?” “Will they tell me? DO I even want them to?”

Well, that’s my rant for today. My writer’s group started back this week, and I drafted it during our writing time. And a good use fo time it was!

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#blogjune

#blogJune day 5

It’s started getting cold here, and regular Readers of this blog may remember I don’t do well in the cold. My athsma plays up: less sunlight equaling less vitamin D equaling a weaker immune system, I guess.

This year, however, I’ve been more healthy than usual. And I put a large part of that down to Hubby. He has a bit of a citrus obsession, you see.

Every Saturday morning he heads to the local fruit market and stocks up on our fruit and veg for the coming week… and citrus forms quite a significant portion of that purchase. He then juices said citrus each morning: about 1.5L for him and 300ml for me. (Yes, he likes his juice!)

It started with just oranges. Then he started adding lemon, and grapefruit on occasion. And I would raise an eyebrow at the cost of it all.

Eyebrow raise no longer. Check out this year’s addition: homegrown!

And they’re beautiful 🙂

Here’s wishing you a fruitful day too, dear Reader – and a safe one, as well.

– KRidwyn

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Random thoughts Work

Habits

The past couple of nights I’ve had around 6 hours sleep (each night) and I am feeling SO much more refreshed each morning! Yeah, I know, 6 hours isn’t enough – but I actually tried last night to get more, but my body wouldn’t let me – I was wide awake at 4.41 and itching to get up and start my day. But I’m sure that my body will get ‘into the habit’ of having more sleep again… hopefully soon!
On a different note, it got me thinking about ‘habits’, which ones we deliberately try to cultivate, and the types of habits that just accumulate in our lives, so slowly that we don’t even notice that they’re forming until they’re rock solid and difficult to move.
Insomnia is a medical condition which I often say that I have. I don’t know if that’s actually true or not, as I’ve never been medically diagnosed with it. Maybe it’s just a habit I’ve formed. I just seem to have lots to get done during the day, and so am up late at night. Or instead, I’ll get up early the following morning, or at other times I’ll wake up during the night, work for a few hours, then go back to bed again. I don’t know if that’s insomnia or not. But I just know that it’s pointless to lie in bed when my brain is racing, planning how to tackle all ‘the things that need to be done’. If I get up, write them down (or actually start working on them) then my brain shuts up quicker and I can get back to sleep. Sound familiar? Or is that just me?
Other ‘habits’ that I know I should probably do something about? Sarcasm. Negativity. Perfectionism. Procrastination. But I’m going to indulge in some of that last one now, and leave dealing with the others until another blog post. LOL!
Have a great day, readers!

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More about me Random thoughts

My love affair with gambling

I’m in Brisbane at as I type. Sitting comfortably on the lounge in Room 1025 of the Novotel Brisbane, looking out my window at what looks to be a gorgeous day shaping up. Thanks to my membership in Accor Advantage Plus, Hubby and I get to spend a ‘free’ night’s accommodation away once a year. So this was it. Last night, as per usual, we dined early at Cafe Mondial, before watching a movie in the Myer Centre, and then I enjoyed a waffle icecream during our leisurely walk back to the hotel.
Last night however, we ended up having an extremely early evening meal, due to neither of us eating since breakfast. Which left us with more time than normal before the movie. And as I’ve blogged about in the past, the Casino was calling to me. As a (recovering?) gambling addict, I often get the overpowering urge to hit the BlackJack tables. Living on the Sunshine Coast, it’s easy to control. But being in Brisbane, within walking distance to Treasury, it’s much harder. And last night, holding tight to Hubby’s hand, I entered.
It was the first time in many years that I’ve voluntarily entered a casino, with the express purpose of being *in* a casino. Not much had changed. The overwhelming, all-encompassing desire was there, the instant recognition of what I would do, had I the chips in my hand, etc etc. Hubby noticed how it had gotten dingier since our last visit, many years ago, but all I noticed was that the minimum bet had risen.
I kept my hands in my pockets. I did not change money into chips. I watched as others around me lost money – and won money – and lost money again. My thought stream was high on adrenalin, going non-stop, deciding what I would have done… Which box I would have bet in, which person I would have backbet, whether the table was getting warmer or cooler, etc etc etc. But, ever so proud of myself, I left it at that. I did not bet. And I walked out again after a while, in time to see “The Hunger Games”.
I would not say that I’m not still addicted. But I think that I’m able to control myself. Not that I’m planning on a solo trip any time soon! But last night helped me see that my mind is stronger than I thought it was. And I’m happy about that.
Have a great day, dear readers!