Month: June 2013

I rarely reflect. I just move. From one thing, to another, to another. I think my self-identity is tied up in what it is I accomplish.

I found it REALLY hard to resign my position as Head of Middle School, a few months before my middle child was born… several years ago, now. I realised then that my identity lay in what I did, rather than who I was, and I also (painfully) realised that my perception of ‘motherhood’ carried nowhere near as much importance or weight, as my occupation did. But I got over it – and it’s only now that I’m back working permanently again (well, for an external employer anyway. I feel as though I kinda *was* working again when I started my website, and then my marketing business!) but I still wonder what my identity is tied up in.

Am I a wife? a mother? a care-giver? a small businesswoman? a boss? a student (on leave this year)? a part-time teacher? a house-owner? a cook / cleaner / washerwoman / housekeeper? how about a daughter / daughter-in-law? sister? sister-in-law? mentor? friend? or from a wider perspective – a child of God? a creation who is closer to her 40th birthday than her 35th (or even 38th?!!!)?

Or am I a combination of all of the above – simply just me?

If you know me IRL, you’d know that I’m the classroom music teacher for a Primary School on Brisbane’s northside. You’d also know that I’m the choir director. You may or may not also know that this is my third time teaching in a Primary School, because I’m High School trained and that’s where I’ve spent the majority of the last 20 years or so in my career.

Being that as it may, when I’ve been in (or in charge of) a music department, arguably my favouritest part (yes, I know. Not a word.) would be the extra-curricular bit. In some schools, this is called the co-curricular bit. What I’m talking about is the non-classroom side of things. The small student groups – music committees, choirs, string ensembles, bands, etc etc etc. The groups of more dedicated students, who are there voluntarily and more committed as a result.

I currently run three choirs at my school. A Junior Chapel Choir for Preppies through to Year 2, a Senior Chapel Choir for Years 3 to 6, and a Performance Choir for auditioned only kids, who go out and represent the school at various events. And who sound amazing, in my own humble opinion LOL.

I love working with them. In getting as much as I possibly can out of them, and seeing how much they love it – the surprise and the pride on their faces when they hear how incredible they sound.

A couple of weeks back, we had our formal photos. Between 40 and 50 kids in each of my Chapel Choir photos, shoulders back and smiling proudly, standing as still as soldiers but laughing at the antics of the photographer who was getting them to all smile at the same time, look in the same direction, etc etc etc. It was great.

What’s not as much fun? Getting the proof back, and having to write, manually, first name and surname on the form, next to almost-100 kids. Realising that every other teacher writes out first name and surname of just their class – less than 30 kids.

Sigh. Best get to it, I guess.

Have a great day, dear reader!

I hate it when my devices have less than 1 hour battery life left – don’t you?

Pretty crazy, when you think that just a few short years ago, we were all stoked that we had as much as an hour before we had to plug back in again!!!

I am lazy. Inherently. But only in certain areas.

I pride myself on my work ethic – in my ‘work’ life, and on the family / children front, and on my house / garden – I work pretty darn hard. In my life as a student too – I like to get 7’s, so will put in the work to get them if I possibly can.

But in the area of ‘looking after me’, I’m a lazy so-and-so. And that includes my diet.

Right now, I’m hungry. But I can’t be bothered to make something healthy. “Quick and easy” is what generally ends up happening – which in reality is “quick and easy and nasty”.

Sad, I know. I really need to think about the example I’m setting to my cherubs.

Okay. Off to the kitchen now. Have a great day, dear reader!

Yes, I know that’s not a word. I know that the noun form for the verb ‘to be anxious’ is ‘anxiety’. But the word ‘anxiety’ is too strong a word for what it is I’m trying to describe. It has too many negative connotations – as do the words ‘angst’, ‘nervous’ and even just ‘nerves’. When it’s really just a ‘twinge of a nerve’ that I want to decscribe. But again, that last one has meanings and associations with the physical body – with a singular nerve – that I’m not after, so back to ‘anxious-ness’ it is. Sorry about that!

And anyway… I have a meeting this morning. With a potential client. So I’m feeling a little twinge (yeh, I like *that* word!) of anxiousness. Many and varied reasons – but still, they’re there.

And that’s what I wanted to share with you this morning. Have a great day, dear reader!

I’m running on empty. I’ve been up since – umm – 5am? And I’ve been “extreme gardening” (a friend’s term for what it is I do, landscaping etc in my backyard) until about an hour ago.

I’m sore. And tired. But there’s still so much to do!!! That tractor last weekend made SUCH a mess 🙁

What seems like ages ago now, but which was probably only a year or so ago, the State government in its wisdom decided to close access to the highway near my house. Meaning that, instead of all the houses in my immediate neighbourhood being able to drive where we want to, and where we have been able to ever since our area was first developed over 30 years ago, we all have to dirt-road it, and drive an extra 10 to 15 mites, each and every single trip.

Unfortunately, such hard wear finally caught up with my beloved car recently. I hadn’t realised deeply I felt about my car until I was without it for a week. Man! What a MAJORLY HUGE HASSLE that week was!!! Not helped by the fact that Hubby’s car was also booked in for a service in the middle of that same week. Three kids, appointments in all directions, booster seats to move between cars – even stuff left in boots of cars that was desperately needed for various activities – it all added up to a pretty extensive headache.

Still an’ all, I now have my car back. Which is awesome. Very happy about that one.

Pity about the money it cost though…

I discovered this program late last year. If you’re into websites – make them, maintain them, etc etc – and you haven’t yet heard of it, check it out – I’d love to hear your opinion!

Mine? I think I like it.

Quite a lot, actually.

Just wish I had more time to actually *use* the thing – play with it more, discover its capabilities…

Wow! Just found the draft I wrote the other day!

Here ’tis the post from Thursday morning:

It’s 4.23am. I’m lying on the floor of Miss8’s room, blogging on my iPhone under the doona. My feet are cold and this floor is rather hard under my shoulder. But I’m pretty happy, all things considered. The opposite of Miss 8, who is in pain from an earache, and still jittery after her first ever nosebleed, and of Hubby, who saw red running from her nose and went straight to ‘panic stations’. Which is fair enough, I guess… but not really what Miss 8 needed!

So. Hubby back in bed (probably to plan out how he’s going to work from home & take Miss 8 to the doctor), Miss 8 cleaned up and lying down, with just one tissue up to her nose (more for comfort than anything else) and I’ve had not many hours sleep and have an early meeting, a full day teaching, then parent teacher interviews tonight.

It’s going to be a long day…

*****

There was more, but that didn’t save to drafts. And I can’t remember it, so I shan’t re-type it. But I’m glad this little bit got saved!

So – I guess *this* was #blogJune post 9 – which means that ‘Sad face’ was post 10, and ‘Time Suck’ was  post 11 – so now I’m up to number 12, right? Not bad for the 23rd of the month #tounguefirmlyplantedincheek

Time. It’s a pretty crazy concept, if you think about it long enough. Well, our perception of it is, anyway. Well, my perception of it is. I guess I can’t really speak for anyone else. Sometimes it seems so incredibly S……L……O…..W….. but at others, it flies by so quickly you can’t remember what you’ve been doing or how indeed you got to where you are already.

I feel like the latter. Most of the time.

Perhaps because, in my marketing job, I’m constantly living ‘in the future’. Planning stuff that will happen. Implementing steps to make it happen. Celebrating when it does happen – but by then, also midway through planning for the next thing – and the next, and the next.

“Live in the moment”? nope. I can’t do it.

And unfortunately, I miss stuff.

And that’s a little sad.

🙁