It is not quite 4pm. Monday. I am at home, sitting on my bed, and the house is quiet. This is extremely unusual, and I love it.
Miss 6 needed to be brought home early today (still sick, poor love, and milking it for all she can get!) so Hubby and I vied for the opportunity. I won (his job is far more important than mine!) so brought her home while he gets to continue working and then pick up the younger two from childcare.
So here I sit, surrounded by papers. Papers from work, reminding me of urgent things to do and far more urgent things to do, drafts from Uni assignments due this week, due the following week, and feedback from assignments submitted two weeks ago… and silence.
Miss 6 is sleeping (?! yeah right! try ‘playing quietly’ in her bedroom,) and I can hear the clock ticking. Very strange sound to hear in daylight hours; normally it is the accompaniment I associate with working into the late hours of the night.
I like it. A pleasant sound. Strange to hear it with a backdrop of birdcalls instead of crickets. But this… this silence… it reminds me to breathe. To relax, if just for a moment, even when surrounded by all the trappings of my responsibilities, and just breathe. Just exist in the moment. It will be over soon enough… hubby will be home with the younger two, and then when they’re all abed, it’ll be time to dive straight back into the Caboolture Show prep (display being created tomorrow) and INN332 Final Report (5000 words due Thursday).
Okay. Just breathe. In… out… in… out…
It’s Sunday evening and I feel as though I’ve been submerged in illness for a LONG time. Sometimes it’s difficult being a full-time mum to three under 7, a full-time worker, and a part-time student when your husband works such long hours too. Looking back, it’s only been a few days, but it feels like so much longer. I think I’ll lift the self-imposed quarantine tomorrow. Yay. Just in time for school, work, childcare, and what generally is the busiest day of my week.
I need a break. Or maybe just the last few days re-wound, so I can maybe meet all those dead lines I missed?!
It looks as though, unfortunately, my #blogjune posts will be shorter than I’d like due to my need to ‘catch up’. Bumma. Sorry, dear readers!
Well last night was vomit-free. Apparently Master 2 fell out of bed, and Hubby put him back in, but I guess I slept through the whole thing. Unusual, because I’m normally the lightest sleeper in the house, but that extra-long day must have taken it out of me. I actually fell asleep in front of the computer, so eventually gave it up soon after 11pm. Seven hours later and I’m feeling human again.
So today marks assignment day. I have a 45% Proposal and an ePortfolio view release due tomorrow, but tomorrow I’m at work, and I also have a newspaper deadline at midday tomorrow (which article I haven’t started yet!) so I’m going to attempt submitting my Uni pieces today. Somehow.
Hence my post this morning. Day 2 of #blogeverydayofJune and let’s meet again on Day 3. Wonder if I’ll have those assignments in by then? Wish me luck!
I’m not so great at the ‘looking in the mirror’ bit. The self-analysis; self-evaluation. I must admit, I’d prefer to remain in the dark and highly self-unaware of my faults; my weaknesses.
Which is why I always dread the self-evaluation that comes with each assignment I complete in this Masters I’m currently attempting. Admittedly, I’m getting better (I think!) and I can recognise, and even acknowledge, some aspects of my personality that I didn’t really know existed – well, on a conscious level, at least.
Like I think I’d be a hopeless manager. (And yes, I need to qualify that statement, for all of you who remember that I used to be IN management positions, as a Head of English and then as a Head of Middle School!)
In Week 1 of this semester, I completed some reading for ‘Management Issues for Information Professionals’ with Katherine Howard that profoundly changed the way I think. There were just a couple of short articles about the difference between management and leadership. One in particular I found thought-provoking enough to re-analyse my own skills in the ensuing reflection. And I realised… I’m hopeless at managing! The day-to-day, ‘Let’s continue to do this, and do it as well as we possibly can’ pales in comparison for me when compared to ‘leadership’, which is the leading of others in a different direction to the one currently travelled. The planning, the organisation, the ‘management of the change’ is I guess the element of management that I absolutely am passionate about. So yes, I am starting to accept that I’m a leader, not a manager.
Maybe that’s why I’m SOOOO in love with my job. I’m breaking new ground. No-one’s been where I’ve been, no-one’s tried doing what I’m doing. And I absolutely LOVE that. Last week I got permission to tweet and update facebook for St Paul’s as part of my job. How cool!!! (We’re @StPaulsLPS, if you’re interested! And our fb page is here – feel free to follow us!) I also set my own goals, and challenge myself to meet objectives that even the Principal and Business Manager believe are pie-in-the-sky. Maybe I’m overly enthusiastic, but I’m looking forward to seeing the results. I’m after full enrolment by the end of 2011. That’s see if it can be done!!!